Every night I have dreams of heights and a body of water with guest appearances from my (non existent) children. I am acrophohobic in my dreams and greatly afraid of the water. Strange because in life I am not afraid. Of heights and can swim. Although drowning is one of greatest fears, it is a slow, terribly painful way to die.... I know why I am dreaming of life and death but it is starting to crawl under my skin and may be the reason why I get up so early in the morning. ( I used to never be up before noon)
My thoughts are haunting me, I hope it doesn't mean what I think it can...
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Friday, September 4, 2009
The Big 2-0
Everyone thinks turning 20 is so insignificant because you can't legally drink in this country til you are 21 but it is really more of a milestone. Sunday, September 6th at 10:37 a.m., it will mark 20 years of life. It has been quite a ride thus far, my life the last twenty years has been one dirty, filthy, fantastic and emotional journey and I could die today and know that I have lived. Life is funny like that.
I just want to thank all the people that had an effect and the most important person that has rode with me literally since day one, my mother. There were times I hated, adored, plotted her demise, wished I could be just like her and look at her in amazement. She is the only reason that I am alive. Period.
SO sunday is the beginning of the next 20 years of life....only difference is this time I am an adult and my life will be solely what I make it.
I just hope I don't fuck up...
...well at least not too bad.
Hell at this point, I have been arrested, switched school and careers twice, got high, partied, in debt, live in Brooklyn, and survived the streets of Chicago (all areas might I add)...not too much I can do that will be new.
So museltof, it's a celebration bitches!
BTW: To the young man that broke my Sidekick LX....I'm on that Blackberry steez now. I'm grown. I'm off that. :-) Muah!
Signing off,
Dallesia Jasmine Verges Payton....That's Barbie to you.
I just want to thank all the people that had an effect and the most important person that has rode with me literally since day one, my mother. There were times I hated, adored, plotted her demise, wished I could be just like her and look at her in amazement. She is the only reason that I am alive. Period.
SO sunday is the beginning of the next 20 years of life....only difference is this time I am an adult and my life will be solely what I make it.
I just hope I don't fuck up...
...well at least not too bad.
Hell at this point, I have been arrested, switched school and careers twice, got high, partied, in debt, live in Brooklyn, and survived the streets of Chicago (all areas might I add)...not too much I can do that will be new.
So museltof, it's a celebration bitches!
BTW: To the young man that broke my Sidekick LX....I'm on that Blackberry steez now. I'm grown. I'm off that. :-) Muah!
Signing off,
Dallesia Jasmine Verges Payton....That's Barbie to you.
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